In an age where texting is the norm, a hand-written love letter can feel especially special. Whether for Valentine’s Day, your love’s birthday, or any other occasion, a letter allows you to go deeper than just a few heart emojis.
Be specific by describing your feelings for the person you love, and their unique qualities. Embrace vulnerability by sharing your fears, aspirations and hopes for the future with them.
1. Get Specific
When writing a love letter, it’s important to get specific. That’s because the more granular you can be, the more real and genuine your love will feel. For example, instead of simply telling your love how much you love them, consider mentioning something like “the way you laugh at my jokes even when they’re not funny,” or “the dimples you get in their cheeks when they smile.”
A good rule of thumb is to avoid using humor that could be misinterpreted (sarcasm, graphic intimacy, or references to tough times), as well as avoiding overly sentimental words that might seem corny or cliched. That said, however, some cheesy lines can be perfectly appropriate in a romantic love letter, especially if they’re in keeping with the tone of your relationship and your partner.
If you’re struggling to find things to say, try writing a rough draft first before creating your final letter. This will give you a chance to edit and add in any ideas you may have forgotten about. Plus, it will give you the chance to work out any kinks in your penmanship—which is especially important if you’re handing this love letter over to your object of affection!
You can make your love letter even more personal and special by decorating it. Use colored markers or stickers to add some flair to your envelope, and don’t forget to wax seal it! This will create a unique and memorable experience for your loved one, and they’re likely to keep it as a reminder of your love.
Another way to make your letter extra special is by including a poem or song that’s meaningful to you and your partner. This is a great opportunity to show that you really care about them and take your love letter to the next level.
If you’re feeling particularly creative, you can also break your love letter up into smaller bits and leave it around their home or office for them to discover over time. For example, you might leave a piece on their desk in the morning before they head to work, or on the back seat of their car before they start it up.
2. Be Yourself
Unlike a text message, a letter allows you to be as creative as possible, and it also gives you an opportunity to write out all of your feelings. You might even include a picture of the person you’re writing to to make the experience more special. The important thing is that you speak from the heart and that you are genuine in your words.
The best love letters are honest and vulnerable, and you don’t have to be head over heels in love to partake in this activity. In fact, Luscombe says that she wrote a few love letters to herself when she was younger, exploring her own feelings of self-love and how she valued who she was as a person.
You may find that the process of writing a love letter can be very therapeutic and can help you to clarify your feelings. This can be especially helpful if you’re struggling with insecurity or a feeling of loneliness, and it can also provide you with an opportunity to see the positive qualities of your loved one.
If you’re having trouble getting into a flow, try listening to some romantic music or lighting some candles with a pleasant scent like lavender or eucalyptus. You can also add a photo of your sweetheart to your work space to help inspire you.
Some people like to set aside a quiet place where they can write, free from distractions and interruptions. You might find that you work better when you’re in a comfortable position, so you might want to try sitting on the couch or on your bed instead of at a desk in an open office.
When you’re ready to begin, consider starting with a few lines about what you love and appreciate about your loved one. Then, move on to the more personal details of your relationship. This might include a fun memory, a cute saying or gesture, or something that’s unique to the two of you (like pet names or inside jokes).
Once you have the most important parts down, you can begin editing and reworking your letter until it feels right to you. It’s always a good idea to read it over out loud to ensure that your language is clear and you’ve included everything that you want to say.
3. Get Creative
A love letter doesn’t have to be written on a piece of fancy paper, but rather it’s a chance to get creative and show your love in a way that’s uniquely yours. For example, you could write your love letter on Post-it notes and leave them around the house for your partner to find throughout the day. You could also enlist the help of a friend to deliver your love letter to them when you can’t be there.
One of the most important things when writing a love letter is to include why you’re loving that person in particular, and don’t be afraid to be specific. This can be anything from the little things like their kindness and sense of humour, to bigger reasons like their integrity and how they’ve supported you through hard times.
Using creative language and poetic expressions can add an extra dimension to your letter. Similarly, including an inside joke is a great way to make them laugh and keep the tone lighthearted without getting too mushy. You can also use song lyrics to express your emotions, or even quotes from famous authors that resonate with you.
Then, don’t forget to sign your letter and draw a heart in the corner. This will add a personal touch that shows you took the time to create something just for them. Lastly, be sure to proofread before you hand it over to avoid any embarrassing grammatical mistakes!
While it’s not essential, a letter that includes an explanation of why you’re writing can increase the intimacy and depth of your message. It can also be helpful if you’re struggling with where to begin or how to express your feelings in a clear and meaningful way.
Whether it’s for Valentine’s Day, an anniversary, or any other special occasion, a love letter can be a powerful and intimate gift that will remind them of how much you care. So take some inspiration from these tips and get writing! With a little creativity and some genuine heartfelt emotion, you can make them feel loved, cherished, accepted, desired, and special.
4. Reaffirm Your Love
Writing a love letter can be a powerful way to affirm or reaffirm your feelings. It can also help strengthen your relationship. “The act of putting your thoughts on paper is an important step in communicating your emotions,” says mental health counselor Chaute Thomson. “It shows that you value your loved one and take the time to put your feelings into words.”
When writing your love letter, be sure to start with a personal greeting like using a nickname or calling them by name. This will set the tone for the rest of the letter and make your recipient feel special right away. It’s also a good idea to share memories from your relationship that have been particularly meaningful to you. These moments can be anything from a funny moment you shared together to reliving the day you met.
In the body of your letter, you’ll want to express your feelings sincerely and authentically. “Write about how their presence in your life has made you happy, and if there’s an aspect of them that you love even more now than the first time you knew them,” suggests Greer. “This can be as simple as mentioning their smile or their epic use of emojis.”
If you have trouble getting started, try recalling a fond memory you’ve shared and the feelings it evoked in you. Then, write about how those feelings are still present in your relationship today and what you see for the future.
When you’re done, reread your letter and see how it sounds to you. Do your sentences sound natural and if you said them out loud to your loved one, would they make sense? Make any necessary tweaks to ensure that the letter sounds as if it was written by you.
Creating a love letter is a labor of love, but it’s also something that your recipient will cherish forever. It’s worth the effort of finding the perfect spot to write, tuning into your emotional state and making sure your spelling and grammar are on point. Once you’re done, give it to your loved one and let them know that it was written with all of your heart.